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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27061975">A dormant question</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/lessStress/pseuds/lessStress'>lessStress</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>EXO (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Childhood Friends, Friends to Lovers, M/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 21:27:55</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,632</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27061975</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/lessStress/pseuds/lessStress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Yixing has a habit of snuggling up on Junmyeon. One day, Junmyeon asks why.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Kim Junmyeon | Suho/Zhang Yi Xing | Lay</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>54</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>A dormant question</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Junmyeon is six when he finds out how snow feels like on his face.</p><p>He is latching behind his mother’s leg as she makes conversations with the neighbour lady.</p><p>In front of him stands a boy, similarly bundled up from head to toe. His name is Yixing, the neighbour lady said, but the boy himself hasn’t addressed Junmyeon with anything more than a curious stare.</p><p>The weather makes Junmyeon shiver a little, but the sparkles in his eyes are still alive as he looks around. He’s never been allowed to spend too much time outside when it’s snowing. His mother is being lenient today for a reason, he assumes – the neighbour lady did mention that her ‘little one’ loves winters.</p><p>Junmyeon is startled when his mother moves her leg, detaching herself from his grasp and pushing him to go play with the boy. He can only look up helplessly as his mother heads to a nearby bench, still occupied in a chat with the neighbour lady.</p><p>He turns to the boy, who crouches to the ground to shovel around the snow with his gloved hands.</p><p>“Um. I’m Junmyeon.”</p><p>“Yes. Your mom told us.” Yixing looks up. “Do you want to play?”</p><p>Junmyeon blinks. Playing in the snow, like in the movies? He doesn’t think he’s ready, but he nods nevertheless and hunkers down next to Yixing.</p><p>Emulating Yixing, he cups his hands on the ground, and there are now white crystals on his palms. It’s icy and granular, simultaneously soft and coarse, and there’s nothing like it to Junmyeon.</p><p>Suddenly, snow lands on his face. </p><p>He freezes on the spot, absorbing the shock from the hit on his face, and he glances towards his companion. Traces of snow are visible on Yixing’s dark mittens, and his mouth gapes even further as Junmyeon remains speechless.</p><p>“Are you okay?” Yixing extends his hand and tilts to see if Junmyeon is hurt anywhere. “I’m so-“</p><p>A dollop hits Yixing right on his cheek.</p><p>After a shake of the head, he finds Junmyeon looking back with a clump of snow on his hand. When Junmyeon throws it, Yixing is more prepared to dodge. The boy runs away laughing as Junmyeon chases him, and they continue throwing snowballs at each other.</p><p>Their steps are soon becoming slower and slower, and Junmyeon falls on his bottom to sit on the ground, legs splayed out. Yixing follows suit and flops on his back to lie down.</p><p>“Isn’t it cold?”</p><p>“It is.”</p><p>Junmyeon looks on. “Can you do that thing?” He flails his arms up and down.</p><p>Yixing gets what he means, and flaps his limbs with vigour. <em> That’s it </em>, Junmyeon lights up. It’s the snow angel – he finally sees it in real life. Junmyeon leans back as well and moves the same way, cheering when he sees the resulting shape.</p><p>Junmyeon is plucked from the ground not long after, with his mother fussing about how long he’s been out in the cold.</p><p>They go inside to have meals. It’s warm and comfortable, and Yixing’s eyes flutter in drowsiness, having tired himself out. He nuzzles into the crook of Junmyeon’s neck and stays there until Junmyeon pats his back, letting him know that the food has arrived.</p><p>🌨️</p><p>“I can’t deal with this,” Yixing slumps over the desk, face fully flat on the notebooks. “Can’t you just let me copy yours?”</p><p>“You won’t be able to copy my answers during exams,” Junmyeon persists. “It’s better if you understand it now.”</p><p>Yixing rises a little, propping his face on his chin with pout still clear on his face. Junmyeon understands. Yixing has been swamped as of late – when he isn’t dozing off in class, he would be attending his acting classes or dance practices. He is also slated to play one of the main characters in the local theatre, and rehearsals are underway.</p><p>But homework doesn’t stop for any fifth-grader – and as a good class president, Junmyeon feels obliged to help his friend catch up. “Come on, it’s just quadrilaterals. It’s easier than remembering your lines.”</p><p>“Fine,” Yixing grumbles. He grabs his pencil and starts running through the questions on the paper. It takes him a while to solve each of them, stopping every now and then to ask Junmyeon about the concepts. When Yixing is finally done, Junmyeon is tempted to continue with the next module they’re doing in class – but his words are caught in his throat when Yixing snuggles up on him and sighs.</p><p>“Junmyeon-ah. Can we get ice cream?”</p><p>An exhale leaves Junmyeon’s mouth, too. He drapes his arm over Yixing’s shoulder. “Sure thing. You worked hard.”</p><p>“I want the chocolate flavour.” Yixing curls up closer. “But later.”</p><p>Junmyeon hums, and they stay like that for a little longer.</p><p>🌨️</p><p>Something is off. Junmyeon isn’t sure what it is – on the surface, everything seems alright. They just played basketball with the others and, as per usual, got back to Yixing’s for some pizza. But even after they are all cleaned up and get their ordered pepperoni pizzas, Yixing is still staring ahead, unsmiling.</p><p>“Xing. What’s wrong?”</p><p>Yixing grits his teeth, hands clenching on a napkin. “I’m moving back to Changsha.”</p><p>It catches Junmyeon off guard. He sits there as Yixing stammers through his explanation – something about an uncle that he’s barely seen getting sick, and a family business that has to be put on hold until his father can return. He will be going before the second school semester starts.</p><p>The napkin has been torn to pieces. “I don’t wanna leave, Junmyeon-ah.”</p><p>What could Junmyeon say? There’s nothing he can do that will change things. So much of Yixing’s life has been established here – his friends, his theatre and dance crew, his go-to joints around the city. Junmyeon remembers Yixing’s upcoming birthday, and how they won’t be able to celebrate at his favourite restaurant like they always do.</p><p>“It sucks.” Junmyeon regrets the words as soon as he said it – they’re reductive and barely do any justice to the situation at hand, but Yixing nestles against his shoulder all the same, and Junmyeon feels his own walls crumbling. This is his best friend, the one he’s practically known all his life, and things won’t be the same anymore without him.</p><p>The silence between them is overwhelming, and it breaks Junmyeon’s heart to see the way Yixing purses his lips, willing the incoming tears away.</p><p>“We can still chat, right?” Junmyeon tries, even if his throat dries up. “Do video calls, things like that.”</p><p>Yixing makes an acknowledging noise. “I will be back. I promise.”</p><p>🌨️</p><p>They make the best out of the remaining weeks and spend the summer holiday doing everything they can – trying out new restaurants, visiting Seoul’s most touristy spots, see how their elementary school looks like at night.</p><p>Yixing insists that Junmyeon should have his guitar, and any of his other belongings that Junmyeon may desire. “You said you wanted to learn how to play,” Yixing says.</p><p>“But that’s yours,” Junmyeon panics, regretting all the times he’s ever taken a peek at the guitar.</p><p>“And I want you to have it,” Yixing declares, handing him the instrument in its case, and Junmyeon couldn’t help but take it as his friend continues packing his belongings into the suitcases and boxes scattered around the room.</p><p>On the day of his departure, the two families take to the airport. As their parents bid farewells, Yixing brings his friend into a hug. As much as Junmyeon trusts him, he couldn’t help but mumble, “Don’t be a stranger.”</p><p>“You know I won’t.”</p><p>They separate, and Yixing picks up his bag on the floor. He looks back and waves before disappearing behind the gate, following his parents.</p><p>When Junmyeon his face with the back of his hand on his way home, it comes away damp.</p><p>🌨️</p><p>High school is coming to an end, and they have kept their words. Junmyeon is seated in front of the computer for their weekly video call. He’s just finished with CSAT, and at this point can’t do anything other than hope that the gruelling hours of studying would pay off.</p><p>“You’ll do just fine,” Yixing says from the other side. “I just know it.”</p><p>Junmyeon smiles. Yixing hasn’t forgotten his promise throughout the years. He never fails to stay in touch even as he keeps himself busy with his new friends at a local dance troupe. He’s also been talking about his plan to go to a university in Korea, to the same institution that Junmyeon is gunning for. Logistics aside, Junmyeon is just excited to have his best friend back by his side.</p><p>For a second, he wonders if the connection goes haywire – only to realise that Yixing is indeed not moving or speaking.</p><p>“Earth to Yixing?”</p><p>“Um? Yeah, I’m still here.”</p><p>“What’s up?” Junmyeon raises his eyebrows. Maybe Yixing feels conflicted about leaving his Chinese friends, he thinks. “Everything okay?”</p><p>“Yeah, it’s all good.” Yixing shakes his head. “Junmyeon-ah.”</p><p>“Yeah?”</p><p>“I like guys.”</p><p>It brings Junmyeon’s breath to a halt for a moment. “Oh.”</p><p>“I like girls, too. But I mean, for the longest time I thought everyone was just like that.” His smile doesn’t reach his eyes, and Junmyeon could tell something probably has happened to lead Yixing to this realisation.</p><p>It angers Junmyeon, that something – someone – made Yixing feel lesser, made him feel like there’s something wrong with him.</p><p>“Junmyeon-ah. Is that- okay with you?”</p><p>“Of course it is,” Junmyeon answers immediately. He’s reminded of all the times his heart flipped when he bickered with Minho from student council or saw that senior Yunho score a goal at the football field. All those times he tried to ignore the strange feelings, because in his most latent thoughts he knew they might not be well-received.</p><p>But Yixing shouldn’t have to feel the same way, at least not around him.</p><p>“Screw anyone who thinks that’s not okay.”</p><p>“Yeah?” A small, albeit genuine smile returns to Yixing’s face.</p><p>“Positive.” Junmyeon nods. “So, what should we do once you arrive?”</p><p>The conversation takes a turn to apartment moves and eating places and hikes. There’s so much to be looking forward to. It would be like nothing has changed.</p><p>🌨️</p><p>But Junmyeon wasn’t exactly right about nothing changing.</p><p>Yixing leaps onto him at the arrival gate, barely minding his suitcase or the large “Welcome Home” sign that Junmyeon is carrying. They pick up dinner at Yixing’s favourite jjajangmyeon haunt before getting to his leased apartment near campus.</p><p>The bare, plain interior gets their wheels turning. They pick up tables and chairs at IKEA, browse paintings and random instruments at art markets, fill the fridge with whatever caught their eyes at the supermarket. School starts before they know it, and while they have different classes they still have the odd lunches and study sessions together.</p><p>Yixing is still the same. He still clumps his mop of hair beneath a beanie, still waves at the dogs they see in other cars on the road, still writes poems about sheep and dinosaurs that Junmyeon could barely get his head around.</p><p>Junmyeon shouldn’t feel any different.</p><p>But his heart skips a beat when Yixing reaches over him to put snacks into the overhead cupboard. He finds himself sneaking glances when Yixing strolls beside him along the campus area. He becomes self-conscious of his presence when he picks Yixing up after his musical theatre practice, even if Yixing never remarks on it, going on about how his day has been going.</p><p>And when Yixing looks at him, it takes all he can not to shrivel up. And it feels like Yixing looks at him <em> a lot </em>. He could no longer tell if it’s a new thing, or if it’s just never been a problem before.</p><p>And it’s happening again this evening. Junmyeon rushes to the rehearsal studio from his Model UN meeting. It’s an inter-school meeting, and Junmyeon has put on a semi-formal suit to impress – appease, really – the seniors. Yixing is seated alone in front of the door and hugging his knees when Junmyeon arrives, and he is quick to splutter apologies in between catching his breath.</p><p>“The meeting ran late and I tried to get here as fast as I can and I mean I love to chat but they’re on a whole other level and you must have- Xing?”</p><p>Yixing is still in a trance, looking right at Junmyeon.</p><p>“Yixing? Is there something?” Junmyeon looks down, patting his dress shirt and striped jacket to see if anything is sticking.</p><p>“No, it’s-“ Yixing blinks, and Junmyeon doesn’t miss his up-and-down glimpse. “You look different.”</p><p>“Oh.”</p><p>“You look good.”</p><p>Junmyeon can feel his face turning crimson, and his laugh comes off more like stutters. “Thanks! Um. Uh, should we get going?”</p><p>He barely waits for Yixing to stand up before turning around, not daring to face his friend.</p><p>Yet when Yixing grabs the crook of his elbow and puts his head on his shoulder, Junmyeon finds that he couldn’t let go.</p><p>🌨️</p><p>It’s strange.</p><p>Some things have grown more frequent – the shy glances they exchange in the car, the soft brush of their shoulders during their night walks.</p><p>It takes Junmyeon some time to become accustomed to it all. He wouldn’t say he understands it. It’s like they’re stepping into an unknown place, where the air is misty and every touch is featherlight.</p><p>The first night of the show, Junmyeon takes the front seat with a bouquet of flowers. He’s never seen a live musical – Yixing has remained tight-lipped about the details, and all he said was <em> you should save your first watch for the show! </em></p><p>The curtains open, and Junmyeon sees Yixing. He’s dressed up and made up – being a first year, he barely gets the centre position and speaks no more than five lines. Yet Junmyeon couldn’t get his eyes off him. The musical’s story itself is quite interesting, Junmyeon surmises – he couldn’t tell, because he keeps getting distracted waiting for someone to show up.</p><p>The crew gathers for the curtain call and bows to the audience. As soon as Yixing looks up, he spots Junmyeon in the crowd. The deep dimple on his right cheek blooms, and his smile turns tender.</p><p>And the world stops for Junmyeon.</p><p>All the applause and cheers sound distant, turning into a blur.</p><p>When he hands Yixing the bouquet, he smiles like there’s no one else around. Not even the theatre member Baekhyun, who offers to take their picture.</p><p>Junmyeon takes him to a celebratory dinner at the jjajangmyeon place, where they sit at the corner and swipe through the photos taken earlier.</p><p>“I look strange with this make-up,” Yixing notes.</p><p>Junmyeon isn’t looking at the screen. “You look beautiful.”</p><p>Yixing’s eyes widen. Junmyeon, too, wonders if he’s hearing his own words right. But he stays rooted where he is, heart hammering through his chest.</p><p>His breath catches when Yixing lets go of the phone and squeezes his hand.</p><p>“You should see yourself.”</p><p>In the small, rustling restaurant, they are wrapped in their own world, smiling at each other with hands intertwined.</p><p>🌨️</p><p>Junmyeon is playing a four-chord song when Yixing pushes his nose onto Junmyeon’s neck.</p><p>“My boyfriend is so cool, with his guitar and all.”</p><p>“It’s technically your guitar.” Junmyeon chuckles. “Can I ask you something?”</p><p>Yixing stirs a little, settling closer to Junmyeon’s side. It piques Junmyeon’s curiosity more.</p><p>“Why do you always do this?”</p><p>“Do what?” Yixing raises his head to see Junmyeon gesturing around him. “Oh, this? Because it’s nice.” He puts his head back and rests his hand on Junmyeon’s waist. “Makes me feel safe.”</p><p>A fond smile grows on Junmyeon’s lips. He sets aside his guitar to embrace Yixing, kissing his hair. “You are.”</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Based on <a href="https://twitter.com/smittenbyzyx/status/1313291463917072385">this prompt</a>.</p><p>Say hi to me on <a href="https://twitter.com/lessstress4">Twitter</a>!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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